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ICOFASHA UMURYANGO | UMUBANO

Ingene wotsimbataza ukwihangana

Ingene wotsimbataza ukwihangana

 “Buri musi, ukwihanga kw’umugabo n’umugore kurageragezwa. Utarubaka urwawe, womengo ukwihangana ntiguhambaye, ariko kurahambaye cane kugira umubano uroranirwe.”​—John.

 Kubera iki ukeneye ukwihangana?

  •   Iyo umaze kwubaka, urabona utunenge tw’uwo mwubakanye.

     “Iyo haheze igihe kinaka wubatse, biroroha cane ko utangura kwibanda ku tunenge tw’uwo mwubakanye. Iyo umaze gutangura kumwiyumvira nabi, biroroha cane ko utakaza ukwihangana.”​—Jessena.

  •   Ukubura ukwihangana birashobora gutuma uvuga ibintu utabanje kwiyumvira.

     “Ndihutira cane guserura uko niyumva ku buryo bishika nkavuga ibintu ntabwirizwa kuvuga. Iyaba nihangana, mba mbanza kuzirikana nimba ivyo ngira mvuge bikenewe vy’ukuri, maze nkaraba nimba nobivuga canke ntobivuga.”​—Carmen.

     Bibiliya ivuga iti: “Urukundo ruriyumanganya kandi rugira ubuntu.” (1 Abakorinto 13:4) Womengo birumvikana ko abantu babiri bakundana babwirizwa kugaragaza ukwihangana. Ariko si ko vyama. Umwe John twavuga agira ati: “Cokimwe n’izindi kamere, kubura ukwihangana biroroshe gusumba kugutsimbataza. Bisaba akigoro kugira umuntu agume agutsimbataza.”

 Wogaragaza gute ukwihangana?

  •   Igihe hadutse ikintu gituma bitoroha ko uguma wihanganye.

     Akarorero: Uwo mwubakanye akubwiye ikintu kikubabaza. Ubwo nyene uca wumva womwihora, ukamubwira ikintu kimubabaza.

     Ico Bibiliya ivuga: “Ntiwihute kubabara mu mutima wawe, kuko ukubabara ari kwo gucumbitse mu gikiriza c’ibijuju.”​—Umusiguzi 7:9.

     Ingene wogaragaza ukwihangana: Banza utekane. Imbere yo kwishura, nufate ko uwo mwubakanye adafise intumbero yo kukubabaza. Igitabu kimwe (Fighting for Your Marriage) kivuga giti: “Nka twese dushira umutima ku vyo twiyumvira ko uwo twubakanye yashatse kuvuga, aho kuwushira ku vyo yavuze vy’ukuri.”

     Naho uwo mwubakanye yoba yashatse kukubabaza vy’ukuri, wihanganye ukareka kumwihora vyotuma ishavu rihwama aho kwunyura ibintu. Bibiliya ivuga iti: “Ahatagira inkwi umuriro urazima.”​—Imigani 26:20.

     “Nimba utanguye kwumva umengo umukenyezi wawe ni umwansi wawe, tekana gatoyi uzirikane icatumye umukunda maze ubwo nyene uce uraba ikintu ciza womukorera.”​—Ethan.

     Zirikana kuri iki kintu:

    •  Uvyifatamwo gute igihe uwo mwubakanye akubwiye canke agukoreye ikintu kikubabaza?

    •  Worushiriza gute kugaragaza ukwihangana ikindi gihe nivyagushikira?

  •   Igihe uwo mwubakanye agumye akora ikintu kikubabaza.

     Akarorero: Uwo mwubakanye yama yacerewe, ukaguma umurindiriye maze bigatuma ishavu ritera riduga.

     Ico Bibiliya ivuga: “Mubandanye kwihanganirana no kubabarirana ata gahigihigi.”​—Abakolosayi 3:13.

     Ingene wogaragaza ukwihangana: Nugerageze gushira imbere umubano wanyu, ntushire imbere ivyo wewe ukeneye. Niwibaze uti: ‘Hamwe nobabazwa n’ivyabaye canke nkashwanira uwo twubakanye vyoba vyokomeza umubano wacu canke vyowonona?’ Vyongeye, niwibuke ko “twese dutsitara kenshi.” (Yakobo 3:2) Ivyo bisobanura ko hariho ibintu na wewe ukeneye kuryohora.

     “Rimwe na rimwe, ndihanganira umugenzi kuruta uko nihanganira umugabo wanje. Nibaza ko ari kubera marana umwanya munini n’umugabo wanje nkabona utunenge twiwe. Ariko ndamwihanganiye, mba nerekanye ko ndamukunda be n’uko ndamwubaha kandi ivyo birahambaye cane mu mubano wacu.”​—Nia.

     Zirikana kuri iki kintu:

    •  Woba wihanganira utunenge tw’uwo mwubakanye?

    •  Worushiriza gute kumwihanganira muri kazoza?